Meditation

Shuffling feet and sweaty ribs mark the beginning of these days
Shifty eyes and swollen cheeks, the end.
You have seen my love in grand forms
Watched me fall, die, resurrect
Clutching the broken pieces of my heart
in my throat: like shards of broken hurt,
smarting with each gasp. (…) … More Meditation

Semi tabellio prima

They always say the walls are supposed to close in. ‘The walls are closing in’. For me, the walls never did close in. Every room, instead, expands into nothingness as I stretch out my hand, trying to find a trace of you. A lingering smell in the clothes that you wore that lie unwashed, a … More Semi tabellio prima

Shakes-a-pear

I wonder what you would do
if I told you
your dreams are useless, doomed to failure
your love is unrequited, a false trap, a lure
your happiness is false, transient like bubbles
your mornings full of sunshine, trouble
will turn to evenings full of longing
unfulfilled, unhappy, tragic, wronging
like the setting sun, miserable in muddy brown
your age, so invincible (now), will let you down
your mind will betray you, have you talking blabber
the ghosts of your loneliness will soon gather,
celebrate your funeral within
years before your innards decay, soaked in sin.

Would you crumble into a pile
fall, look at me with glazed eyes

or would you fight (for) me, punch me down
kiss me goodnight, with hope in your mouth?

For I’m Portia, my love
and all the caskets have death written unto them –
but the bronze one has hope, perhaps a new dawn
and so we live on
and so we live on. … More Shakes-a-pear

Merde de cheval

(I’m in a phase of crippling writer’s block – hence the absence of writing – and it has been a while. I have accepted that I don’t know if it will ever go away. On this blog, I hardly ever post anything that I don’t like, but I’m going to let go of that rule … More Merde de cheval

So how do we win?

I’m terrified of people. Not scared. Not apprehensive. Not mistrusting. Terrified. Run-to-the-closet-and-hide-in-it-terrified. I don’t dislike them – I fall in love with them quite often, whether as best friends or lovers or family. I fight for them. I fight them. No, I don’t. That strikes the nail on the head quite well. I don’t fight … More So how do we win?