Tears in my eyes.
Am I surprised? Yes.
Things are fucked up more than they ever had been, so such a reaction should not have taken me by surprise. But these tears, they are not sad. That’s what caught me by surprise.
One thing leads to another, and thinking and thinking, going back in time, reading old chats (I have to give up doing that) made me realize the magnitude of it all. The whole picture hit me like a wall. My breath was knocked out. These little things, these warm feelings, a little every day, I never knew where they were leading. Never knew that these actions I was doing just in the moment meant anything. I was the practical, logical person who promised herself that she would just date, and that’s it. I was even a little relived that I did not have a ‘crush’ on the person I decided to start dating. He just made me happy, as simple as that. But, I realized something right now.
I have hopelessly, completely, thoroughly fallen in love.
Oh my God.