Every once in a while, I realize.
I realize that the synchronized sound of Ted, Lily, Marshall and Robin laughing at Barney’s perfect joke is not the same as my best friends guffawing at someone slipping and falling in a puddle.
I realize that the amazing verse of Coldplay’s Atlas is not the same as someone humming an apparently romantic song tunelessly while I’m walking with a guy who’s supposedly my new love interest.
I realize that no Tumblr quote is as beautiful a compliment as actually meeting someone and telling them how much you missed them.
I realize that no YouTube video is so enjoyable and no Facebook update so essential as taking a long walk on an empty road just when the sun is going down.
I realize that the sound of the keys of the computer keyboard is not the same as suddenly hearing Linkin Park after ages and banging out the beats on the cafeteria table
I realize that no matter how many ‘:*’s or ‘*hug*’s you may send me, it is not equal to that lighting up of the face when you see me after a long time
I realize that though the virtual world is so much more accepting of me, so much less judgmental and totally in my control, I need to step out and learn.
I need to learn that every thing I do not like cannot simply be closed by clicking on a tiny ‘x’.
I need to learn that true happiness is feeling the warmth of a hug when I’m down, not closing myself in my room with headphones on and bawling my eyes out.
I need to learn that I cannot plan every second of my day by scheduling an ‘event’ or a ‘meet’ or a ‘hangout’.
I need to learn that, after all, there is some truth in the cliched ‘smelling the roses’.